Not sure if I can be a good woman...
So I've cheated twice in my past relationships. I try to analyze why I did it. Thr first time my bf was an ass and would call me names ect. After seeing how I hurt him I learned to just break things off if I'm being mistreated.
The 2nd, my bf was hrs away, had a lot of issues going on, my car broke down and I couldn't see him or get to him. My BD who I kept telling I was seeing someone didn't respect it-- I guess bc he couldn't physically see him. Well, he kept making passes. I kept saying no, multiple times,multiple days, weeks he still kept trying, kept touching me and would pop up at my place unannounced and I just gave in.
100% my fault. I could've not did it but .. I just succumbed to the pressure. I feel I can't trust myself now.
What would you all would've done different in the 2nd situation? I want to love and experience something healthy but I don't want to hurt anyone. So idk.
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Hey at least you’re taking responsibility for it. When there’s awareness, there’s choice. And when there’s choice, there’s change. However I think the most important relationship that you need to evaluate is your relationship to yourself. Ask yourself if you think you deserve a happy, healthy, loving relationship. Try to figure out why you’re sabotaging yourself. Id spend some time in this area without seeing other men.
@Jessica I told my ex no plenty of times, this went on for weeks. I shouldn't have done what I did but I gave innbc I was tired. We have a child so I can't cut him off completely. My daughter asks about him.
@Jessa I'm definitely going to try therapy.
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You sound like you need to be in therapy because you willingly are allowing yourself to sabotage a relationship, and then cheating with a person who you already know it can’t work with, seeing as he’s your ex. You may be stuck in an emotional pattern of being drawn to what is toxic for you, as that is what feels comfortable and accepting the love you think you deserve, which in this case may not even be love and is just sex but that to you might be how you feel loved. All things that a therapist can help you learn about yourself and teach you how to break the cycle.